Evaluating our own personal level of success can be an intimidating task. We all have different versions of what success looks like, and it doesn’t necessarily look the same as the Queen next to us.
Sometimes, we measure success in comparison to the success of our friends and family. Or, sometimes, we even use their versions of success as a reference for what we think our lives should look like. Other times, we are even quick to judge those around us based on where they are in their own life.
Instead of comparing and contrasting based on others’ version of success, what we should really be doing is looking inward and asking ourselves this question—Am I truly where I want to be in my life?
Are you making time to do the things that you love? Are you making time to be with the people you love? Are you where you want to be mentally? Are you where you want to be physically? Are you where you want to be in your career? Are you where you want to be in your relationship?
The reason why it’s important to ask yourself these questions is because these are some of the things that affect our overall level of happiness in life. These are some of the things that guide the decisions that we make on a daily basis. These are things that we value and the things that are our driving forces.
If your answer is "no" to most of these questions, then what are you doing to change that?
Have you ever pictured what you want your life to look like instead? Have you ever taken the time to think about what you should be doing to get to where you want to be? Have you identified the things that are holding you back from becoming who you want to be?
If you haven’t done any of these things, then, it’s time to start now, Queen!
Here at Queens Healing Queens, we work with women every day who are very dissatisfied with where they are and dream of doing something differently. There is no “right” or “wrong” on this. It’s all about what matters to each of us.
The first step is always the hardest, but after a little while, you’ll finally start to see the progress, and, eventually, you’ll see just how far you've come.
Remember, Queen, we can’t solve a problem if we don’t know what it is, so take time to think about it. Once you’ve done that, you can start to navigate your way towards finding a solution.
How to get yourself from where you are to where you want to be:
Have a set of clear goals. Take the time to sit down and develop the picture—make it as clear as you can with written words, cut-outs from magazines, drawings, pictures, etc. Make the vision of where you want to go as vivid as possible.
Make a list of priorities. It needs to be a necessity to say “no” to certain things or to walk away from something that isn’t in line with your goals. Unfortunately, we can’t possibly do everything all in one day, so we have to make choices. Having a clear list of priorities allows you to stay focused.
Have a plan. We waste way too much time thinking about “what’s next?” when we don’t have a clear plan for each day, each week, or even each month. Having a plan doesn’t mean you can’t throw it out from time-to-time in favor of something else, but it does allow you to see how much time you have and where you are allocating it.
Spend time doing things that energize you. Every day, find things that feed your soul and give you the energy to invest in the other things you need to do. Don’t spend your time on things that pull you down and drain you; focus your time on the things that uplift you.
Know your triggers. We all have different ways we react to stress. Know your triggers—what stresses you and know how you react to them in a healthy way. Become aware of the stress and choose to manage it. Don’t let stress steal the energy you need to do what you really want to do. We all have triggers, and you’re the only one who can defeat yours. The secret to permanently breaking through a trigger is finding something greater—whether it’s faith or family or your desire to reach your potential and meet your goals. When you overcome your triggers, you overcome any self-destructive behavior that may be holding you back.
Don’t let yesterday’s mistakes make you afraid of tomorrow. Instead of getting swept up in the past, bring forward only the things that will help you succeed in the future. Everyone has setbacks, challenges, failures, mistakes, and adversities, but you always have a choice of what you carry ahead with you.
Treat every experience as a resource. Think of all your experiences—good and bad—as a library of resources available anytime you need the wisdom and accumulated knowledge they hold. Experience is the best teacher, a powerful source of information tailored exactly for you. Treat it as an asset in creating the life you truly want.
Know what drives you. It’s important to understand what drives and motivates you because that knowledge allows you to go after what you want. We all have moments in our lives that give us our motivation and our drive to pursue what we want. Stay connected to those moments, so you can tap into them when you need inspiration.
Find your sphere of influence. Surround yourself with people you can work with to create a powerful network of like-minded people who can help one another go to the next level.
Think bigger than yourself. Now and then, we all find ourselves at a turning point, a time when life seems to be asking us to choose between staying stuck in the same place and moving out to something new where the destination is yet to be determined. If you venture out, the tests and hardships you meet along the way will boost your courage and help you become more than you ever thought possible.
Pain is only temporary. Remember that the pain of the process is temporary, but the feeling of achievement lasts forever. Failure doesn’t mean the game is over; it means try again, but this time with experience. Failure is a part of life, so don’t let temporary setbacks keep you from success. Persistence is the key, so simply refuse to give up, Queen.
Set your boundaries. Especially in times of change, you need to know who you are and what’s important to you, what you’ll tolerate, and what you won’t, where you can say “yes,” and where you can never compromise. When you do, you can assure that you will stay on track by steering yourself away from the distraction of misplaced priorities.
Make friends with fear. Learn to be okay with failure, secure in your commitment, and knowing that you won’t quit when things get hard. Even though failing isn’t ideal, it can teach you way more than when things always go according to plan. Never be afraid to fail; be more afraid of not trying.
Reinvent yourself as needed. Reinvention doesn’t mean altering who you are or what you’re about. It may be as simple as a new method of pursuing the same dream.
At the end of the day, if you want to get yourself from here to there, you need to take everything you know and everything you need to learn forward. This week, commit to setting your goals if you haven’t done so. If you have, set your priorities and make your plan. Find things that you enjoy and that fuel you and manage the stress that can steal your happiness, and you’ll get to where you truly want to be in no time. Happy travels, Queen! #rp #share #queenshealingqueens #mysisterskeeper #wegotus
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